Combining Households is an Adventure

Well hive, the long-awaited day finally happened last Saturday. No, not the wedding, but Mr. Blue Moon's graduation from college. It's an exciting day for anyone regardless of the surrounding circumstances, but this day was especially special for us because it marked the day we would finally kiss long-distance goodbye and combine our households in the same state, and even the same city, for good!

With the happy graduate! 

Mr. Blue Moon's lovely family. 

After the graduation ceremony was over, Mr. Blue Moon's family took us to lunch. When we got back to campus, it was totally empty. My wonderful future in-laws helped us pack up Mr. Blue Moon's dorm room (I won't miss that place!) and we all said our goodbyes. While they headed back to our hometown in Tennessee, the two of us found ourselves on an empty campus where we spent four years, facing a five hour drive back to Mississippi, and no idea what to do next.

Until this week, it's just been me plugging along by myself, visiting Mr. Blue Moon when I can, and enjoying his visits to Mississippi. There has never been a period of time that we were together without dreading the day we'd have to be apart again. So it feels great to know that we are done with the long distance thing forever. 

Living together makes everything feel special, and I wasn't expecting that. Even though we have been dating for six years, we're having a great time coming up with all our "firsts" under the same roof. First grocery list. First bottle of wine opened. First time watching TV on a couch that's in OUR house instead of MY house. It's fun. 

Of course, some things have been kind of difficult, but in a hilarious way. Right now, my home office is also functioning as a guest bedroom, but Mr. Blue Moon really wanted to hang his college degree the day after he moved in. I had to take down one of my paintings to make room, and I think that's when I realized that even small decisions like what to hang in a room are going to be made together.  Mr. Blue Moon also took one look at my shoe closet, and immediately went out to buy a shelf that's taller than I am to get it organized. 

This shoe rack changed my life. 

I think a large part of the fear we were experiencing upon Mr. Blue Moon's graduation was based on the fact that he did not yet have a job. With my housemate, Bridesmaid H, moving out, it was imperative for Mr. Blue Moon to find something solid so we can afford to stay in the same place. He interviewed with a company on Monday, and I'm proud to say that he landed it and will start as an animal hematologist in a national lab in early June. I'm so proud of Mr. Blue Moon! 

To any other young brides who have been facing some nervousness about how they're going to make it, I think it all tends to work out. Now that we are settling in and Mr. Blue Moon has a job, we can throw all our energy into the rest of the wedding planning. We're just about fifty days away now, so it's coming up fast! I can't wait to call this guy my husband. 

Just settling in with our two munchkins. 

Is your big move in together going to happen before or after the wedding? What's the hardest part about it?  

We Lucked Out: Finding our Photographer

Out of all the wedding expenses I knew we would have, the one I dreaded most was the photographer. Our dear friend took our engagement photos for us, but we want her to be able to kick back and enjoy the wedding- especially since her daughter is our flower girl! So the photographer research began. Looking at wedding photographers is what sold me on the fact that I have chosen the wrong career. They typically make more on a single wedding than I do in an entire month as a first-year teacher. But I digress- beautiful photos to last a lifetime is a top priority.

I know I love soft, romantic photography. The use of natural light is important to me since we are going to be surrounded by so much beautiful Tennessee countryside that I want to feature in the background of our pictures.

Photo by Teale Photography via Bridal Musings

Photo by Doerman Photography 

Our reception venue has so many beautiful outdoor locations, and I really wanted a photographer who will utilize the natural landscape. 

 A couple's engagement shoot at our reception venue, overlooking a lake. Photo by Leah Michelle Photography via Graystone Quarry

I was also looking for a photographer who would take beautiful candids, because I'm a sucker for sweet candid shots such as these. 

  Photo by Jessie Holloway Photography via MyWedding.com 

  Photo by Tausha Ann Photography

And finally, I wanted a photographer who can take dramatic, serious-looking shots. Mr. Blue Moon and I are about the least dramatic and serious people you can imagine, so getting this type of photo for posterity's sake is going to be a tall order, indeed. 

 Photo by Jessie Holloway Photography

 

Photo by Teale Photography via The Knot

 

 

I expected that finding a photographer to cover all these bases would be a tall order. I was talking to our wedding planner about my issues with finding a versatile photographer that was also affordable, and she suggested that we talk to Amilia James of Amilia Photography. Something rang a bell, and I quickly remembered that Amilia actually graduated in Mr. Blue Moon's high school class. I used to have study hall with her and one of my favorite teachers. I looked at some of her work, and boy was I impressed.

 

I loved all of her photos, and knew that she would be able to deliver exactly what we want. I reached out to Amilia and she explained her pricing structure to us. We decided to book her for the pre-festivities, the ceremony, and part of the reception. I think we will feel more comfortable with someone we have known for years, and I can't wait to work with Amilia on the day of the wedding. I'm already dying to get my hands on pictures for an event that hasn't even happened yet! 

How did you choose a wedding photographer?

We Finally Get Rid of These Invitations

Bees, you'll have to pardon my hiatus of a couple of weeks. My students' state testing started yesterday, and things are pretty crazy around here until next week. Then my job calms down and I will have time to blog my bridal heart out!

As you might recall, we ordered invitations about a month ago and Blue Mom, Mr. Blue Moon and I have been trying to find the time to get together and stuff them to get them ready for mailing. We settled on last weekend, and after furiously cleaning my house for a week, Blue Mom and Daddy Blue Moon arrived from Tennessee. I love having house guests, but this weekend was all business.

 

Blue Mom and I spread all of the stationary out across my kitchen table, and it sure looked overwhelming at first. I had put her in charge of handling everything wedding-related during the three weeks leading up to my students' state testing, and like me, Blue Mom tends to go overboard so that we have a lot of choices. We had lots of different envelopes and stamps to choose from, and different materials to tie up the invitations. 

 

We stuffed each invitation in the order you see here, following the traditional order of invitation, under reception insert, under reply card. We tied up everything with hemp twine for my rustic element, and to throw back to the kraft brown envelopes we used on my save-the-dates.  

It took a lot less time than I expected to tie all those bows and stuff every envelope! We got an assembly line going where I was tying and Blue Mom was stuffing in the envelopes. We did about a third of them on Friday night, and got up early on Saturday to finish the rest. I think it took about three hours total to finish everything. Mr. Blue Moon and Daddy Blue Moon were supposed to be helping, but ended up binge listening to our vinyl collection in the den instead. I guess boys will be boys! 

 

Instead of forking over for professional calligraphy, Blue Mom had a college acquaintance do it for half the price.  We chose lavender inner envelopes, and sealed them with matching labels. We ended up having A BUNCH of these little labels left over, so I'm thinking about putting them on our favors. 

 

The outer envelopes are ivory, and look like this with my lavender inners. We got envelopes from a local stationary store because I don't like the quality of Vistaprint's. 

Overall, I'm super happy with the way my invitations turned out. They feel customized to us without being over-the-top expensive. During the process, I learned a few things that I want to share with you all as you get ready to send out wedding invitations.  

1. Get Help: It would have taken double the time to stuff invitations if Blue Mom had not been around to help me with everything. 

2. Don't Try To Please Everyone: Vistaprint sent us several versions of my invitations free of charge to choose from because we were second-guessing the small font size. I stuck with my gut in the end even though there were a range of opinions and used my original choice. Make sure whatever you choose makes you and your partner happy! 

3. They Might Not Be Perfect: We had to add some names at the end, and Mr. Blue Moon addressed them in his best calligraphy. It bugs the crap out of me that my invitations aren't uniform, but the guests won't know the difference, and theirs will be that much more special for being addressed by the groom himself! I realized at some point that I was getting dragged down by these tiny details. Don't sweat the small stuff! 

4. Thank Your Helpers: Whether it's your fiance/fiancee, your parent, or your bridesmaids helping you handle invitations, make sure you thank them for their time spent. Blue Mom drove three and a half hours to do invitations with me, and I know it was boring work. I was able to take her to lunch on Saturday and spend some quality time together, so it felt like a  nice weekend even though some of it was spent working!

I will say that now that invitations have been mailed, this whole wedding thing finally feels like it's really, really happening! I have never been more excited for something, and I can't wait to share the rest of our details coming together. Mr. Blue Moon is here in Mississippi during a long lull in his final exams week, and we are saying "goodbye for now" for the last time tomorrow morning. He graduates on Saturday, and then he's moving in for good! I can't wait to have him around all the time! 

What kinds of exciting things do you and your partner have coming up? How did you feel when invitations went out? 

*All photos are personal

Patience, Young Padawans: The Beauty of a Long Engagement

This is my second Star Wars reference on Weddingbee. I'm kind of ashamed of myself.

Via Mashable.com

 

 

Yesterday, Mr. Blue Moon and I celebrated our two year proposal anniversary. Mr. Blue Moon sent a beautiful flower arrangement to me at work, and we went on a pizza date to Mellow Mushroom. As we sat and reflected on our relationship and everything that has happened over the last two years, we started talking about whether we would do it all over again this way or not.

 

If we had gotten engaged when we were both out of college, already had enough in savings, and secure jobs, would we have waited two years to get engaged? Probably not. But if we had to do it again on the exact same timeline, we would do this thing the same way. As we've spent all this time planning and saving and planning some more, we have realized some definite benefits to having a long engagement, and if anyone else out there is facing a long engagement, take heart! You will get some perks in the planning process that shorter-timeline-couples may not experience.

 

1. Less Pressure

 

Via HockeysFuture.com

 

The nicest part of a long engagement is that you're under zero pressure, and can do pretty much everything and make every decision at your own pace. Right after my proposal in 2014, I went into a wedding planning frenzy. That's when I put together my super detailed wedding planning binder, pinned all of my inspiration ideas like mad, and started thinking about ceremony and reception locations. But, when college finals stress hit or I had something else going on in my life, I didn't have to feel guilty for putting wedding planning aside for weeks, or even months, at a time. I knew it would be right there waiting for me to pick it back up whenever I was ready.

 

2. More Celebrating

 

Via MemeGen.com

 

 

An obvious perk of a long engagement is just that there's more time to celebrate the engagement itself. Instead of rushing to the wedding part, we've had two years to get used to calling each other fiancé/fiancee, celebrating with our family and friends through parties and dinners, and really just enjoying this special time of our life without any rushing at all. I really love being engaged because it's such an exciting time. Couples are right on the brink of a new life together. I have really loved having two years to celebrate Mr. Blue Moon and enjoy all the little moments knowing that it's all leading up to a beautiful marriage.

 

3. The Focus is Off the Wedding



Generally speaking, I think having such a long engagement has helped me keep things in perspective. I know that many brides, especially young brides (like me), can find themselves so invested in the planning of one princess day that they lose sight of the marriage. I was really worried about being one of them, because let's face it, a wedding is very special and very exciting, and theoretically, will only happen once in your life. It's easy to get lost in the planning. Taking our planning process so slowly has helped me focus on Mr. Blue Moon and the life we are building together for when the wedding is long over. It also helps me take pause and just really appreciate the people around me: my mom and mother-in-law, my dad and father-in-law, our funny and adorable siblings, our grandparents, my dear friends, the guests that we love and can't wait to spend the big day with. It is so magical to see everyone working together from several different corners of the country to make our wedding happen. And I know that after it's over, we have an amazing support system in these people who can help us through the rough patches that we'll inevitably face.

 

With Mr. Blue Moon's family. Just some of the people who are supporting us and helping it all come together. Personal Photo.

 

 

4. Saving Money

The obvious trick here is that Mr. Blue Moon and I have had two years to build our savings, and come up with a plan for our first year of marriage. I have had this past year to establish my career and start nesting in our future married home. However, we are also saving money on the wedding itself because we're not under such a time crunch. We can wait around for sales and deals, and we have time to research the best vendors without being under any pressure to book right away.

 

5. Planning to Perfection

Even though our two-year timeline enables me to put the wedding on the back burner when I want to, when I DO decide to go full-planning mode for a few weeks or months at a time, the long engagement enables us to have time for all the little details and making sure things are exactly what we envision. We have been able to change our minds about vendors who we might be stuck with on a shorter timeline, and we were able to wait for the opening of my dream reception venue, which didn't even exist when we first got engaged two years ago. Even though I'm usually not the bride who wants to worry about every little detail, the timeline enables me to do that when the fancy strikes me.

 

 

Via Weddingwire.com

 







Of course, there are cons to every beneficial thing. We are obviously running out of patience, and ready to be married. And our tastes have changed a little bit over two years, so some of the things we thought we'd want to include in the wedding aren't our style anymore. There is a little bit of a stigma around long engagements in the South. Weddings tend to happen quickly here (my parents were engaged for only three or four months), so there have been some jokes and off comments about Mr. Blue Moon stringing me along or how we'll never get married and just be engaged forever. But overall, I have thoroughly enjoyed my long engagement and I would definitely encourage couples who think their circumstances might warrant one to go ahead and wait. It has been a lot of fun!

 

How long is your engagement? What are some of the pros and cons to your own planning timeline?



 

 



 

Flower Power

As you all know, I am planning much of my wedding from a distance with the help of Blue Mom and my future mother-in-law, Mama Blue. Today they are meeting with our potential florist to price out bouquets, bouts, and ceremony/reception flowers. Mr. Blue Moon's family decided to follow the old tradition of paying for the people flowers: the corsages, boutonnieres, the bridesmaids' bouquets, and my bridal bouquet, and my parents are generously paying for the floral décor.

The first thing Mr. Blue Moon and I did was sit down and make a list of all the flowers we would need.

People Flowers:
--1 bridal bouquet
--4 bridesmaids' bouquets (doubling as reception centerpieces)
--10 boutonnieres for 1 groom, five groomsmen, 2 dads, and 2 granddads
--6 corsages for 2 moms, 3 grandmothers, and 1 great-grandmother

Ceremony Flowers:
--2 wreaths for the front doors of the church
--1 wreath for the alter
--at least four flower pomanders for the family pews
--3 large arrangements for the front of the church and the guestbook table (can be moved to the reception for centerpieces and decorations)

Reception:
--bulk baby's breath for small arrangements
--other stuff that my wedding planner knows about and that doesn't concern me much because I fully trust her judgment

I think the flowers I'm most excited about are, of course, my bridal bouquet. I have three favorites that I've been eyeballing on blogs, and I really hope the florist we end up choosing will be able to deliver!

Photo by Stephanie Fay via Zalkopp.com // Floral arrangement from Camelback Flower Shop

Maybe I should have been a spring bride, because I am in love with luscious peonies. Their soft, full look is so romantic for any wedding.

Photo by The Nichols, bouquet from The Noveau Romantics, via Green Wedding Shoes

 

 

The lavender and sweet peas in this bouquet are charming. I like that this one has more color.

 

Photo by Allison Suter Photography, bouquet from Mi-Won Christiaanese, via Style Me Pretty

 

 



 



Out of my top three favorite bouquets, this one is probably my favorite of all. I love the addition of the peach, the amnesia roses are beautiful, and it looks like it has some succulents as well, which I love. I really hope that Blue Mom and Mama Blue can talk to the florist about something like this. It is so nice to have them as my right-hands on the hometown end of planning the wedding.

 

Photo by Liz Grogan Photography, boutonniere from Just Priceless, via Every Last Detail

 

I love this look for the men. The only thing I can't decide is whether I want the order different bouts for my groom, the groomsmen, and then the fathers/grandfathers. I love this one so much that I might just use it for everyone, but I would also like to think of a way to distinguish Mr. Blue Moon.

 

 



Flowers from Fancy Petals Florist, via their website

 

 

I like a simple look for the bridesmaids bouquets, too. I would like to incorporate the lavender like this, but maybe with less baby's breath.

 





The other place where I'm really stuck is with the corsages. I know we want wrist corsages for the moms and grandmothers, but I have no idea what they should look like. Similar to the boutonnieres, I guess.

 

I can't wait to update with my decoration inspiration, plus what we ultimately pick! How did you choose wedding flowers, and what are you prioritizing?

In Which We Design Invitations

We are just under three months away from the wedding! I can't believe how close we are to our wedding day. We have had such a long engagement that it has always felt like the wedding is eons away. Now that it's coming up so fast, every decision feels surreal.

Being at the three month mark, our wedding planner has been on us about ordering invitations, and of course, she's totally right. For some reason, invitations were one of the more difficult decisions for me to make. I think I began to get overwhelmed by all my options.

From the very beginning, I have waffled on the type of style I favor. I wondered if a rustic or vintage look would be the way to go to match our wedding theme.

 

Rustic Lace Wedding Invitation from DawnMarieCreations82 on Etsy.com

Pink Shabby Chic Invitations from Jinaiji on Zazzle.com 

Even though these invitations would match the wedding's "theme," I really didn't feel like they are very "me." I would rather have something with a pop of color, because I love color, and I knew we could still find something that would coordinate with the wedding. 

I heard a lot about Basic Invite, where the colors are fully customizable, and I thought that might a great option for us. I found some gorgeous invitations that I really loved, and customized them with our wedding colors. 

This is called the Illustrated Corner Wreath, and here's how it would look in our wedding colors. 

 

Invitation

 

Reply Card

 

Reception Enclosure

We could have gotten 85 of these for between $300 and $400, which is what I was prepared to pay in the budget, but I still hesitated a little bit. That still seemed like a lot of money to pay for something that most people just eventually throw in the trash, and for whatever reason, I still wasn't positive that these were exactly right for the vibe of our wedding. 

I looked around at some of the beautiful invitations on Minted and Wedding Paper Divas, but I also wondered if it was possible to find something I loved on my old friend, Vistaprint. After all, that would certainly be the most cost-effective, and it would also leave us with enough left over to spare for upgrading to nicer paper and such.  

Invitation

Reception Enclosure

 

Response Card

These are located here at Vistaprint's website. They seemed just ok when I was designing them. I think my main problem with these and the invitations from Basic Invite was all the white space. I know that's traditional, but I thought I could find a design better suited to us. 

Enter these lovelies. The colors are right, and I love the monogram at the top and the purple borders around the edges. 

 

Invitation 

 

Reply Card

 

Reception Enclosure

The back of our invitation and reception enclosure have our monogram written horizontally, like this.

We also threw in envelope seals. We might not use them, or we might use them on favors instead of on the invitations, but they were a great deal.

I played with the font sizes and designs a little bit, and customized my reception card completely because Blue Mom requested to know ahead of time how many people will be eating vegan, vegetarian, and meat. That will make it easier for us to order the proper amount of everything from the caterer. 

Aside from all you see here, I ordered brown kraft outer envelopes from a different company, and we're going to use the envelopes that Vistraprint supplies as inner envelopes. We ordered the invitations and enclosures on linen pressed paper. All told, our total hovered around $180. We can't beat that price, and I am super happy with the design I chose.

How did you pick invitations?

 

 

 

 

Musically Inclined

I come from a very musical family. Two of my uncles and my youngest brother are incredible guitar players, and Mr. Blue Moon's brother has a great voice. I've lived in three amazing places for music: Nashville, Macon, Georgia, a mecca for southern rock, and the Mississippi Delta for the blues. You would think that by now I would have at least made some time to learn to play an instrument with some proficiency or something. I guess it's just not to be.

Brother S and my two uncles jamming last Christmas. Personal Photo

That said, I LOVE music even if I can't really make it. Choosing music for both our wedding ceremony and the important dances at the reception was a lot more difficult than I anticipated, so I thought I would share some of my process for whoever is struggling with this like I did.

For the ceremony, I started by thinking about what I DON'T want. Blue Mom was all for having everything stay very traditional. Canon in D, Wagner's Bridal Chorus, and pretty much everything she had in her wedding. All of these ideas would make a beautiful wedding ceremony, but I considered how we might be able to personalize some of the music to who we are as a couple.

With that goal in mind, Mr. Blue Moon and I picked a couple of songs from movies that we love or songs that have an important meaning to us to be played instrumentally as part of the ceremony.

I have dozens of songs I love from movie soundtracks, so we decided that the ceremony would be a good way to sneak them in without having an overtly wizard, Disney, or classic film themed wedding. Both being massive Harry Potter nerds, but not wanting it to take over our wedding day, we decided to use a song from one of the movies, Neville's Waltz, as our prelude song immediately before the ceremony begins. I also chose an instrumental version of Moon River from Breakfast at Tiffany's for the wedding processional, when our groomsmen, bridesmaids and flower girl will process down the aisle.

For the bridal processional, I chose the title song from Tuck Everlasting, a movie I adored as a kid. Mr. Blue Moon is putting his foot down on any over-the-top Disney references, but this one will be subtle. Even after I grew out of the movie (sort of), I always seem to have the melody stuck in my head. It sounds so romantic, and it's also nice and short- since our aisle is seriously only going to take like fifteen seconds for Daddy Blue Moon and I to walk down, it didn't make sense to pick a piece that won't even really be started by the time we reach Mr. Blue Moon.

Mr. Blue Moon also suggested that we think about some songs that mean a lot to us lyrically. Even if our guests don't recognize them, they will still have a deep meaning for us. To that end, we chose our recessional song based off of one we have listened to many times on our long trips between each other's cities. Our wedding will truly be a homecoming after so many years of long-distance living!

How I'm going to feel when we finally live together. Image via PetMountain.com

For the seating of the grandmothers and mothers, I decided to compromise with Blue Mom on something more classic. We will also have one hymn sung a capella during the ceremony itself.

The final breakdown looks something like this:

Prelude: Neville's Waltz by Patrick Doyle
Seating of the Family: Canon in D by Johann Pachelbel
Wedding Processional: Moon River (Instrumental) by Henry Mancini
Bridal Processional: Main Title by William Ross
Hymn: The Greatest Command
Recessional: Home (Instrumental) by Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros

We've hired Mockingbird Musicians, a piano and violin duo, for our ceremony music, and I know they'll do an amazing job! They are charging us a little more to arrange some of the lesser-used selections on our list, but I think it's worth it to have exactly what I had in mind.

How are you choosing your ceremony music? Do you like the traditional sound, or are you stepping a little bit outside of the box?